tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63011495811513030862024-02-18T19:49:14.912-08:00going dutch in beijingWelcome to the Going Dutch in Beijing website. The book is a lighthearted guide to manners, attitudes and customs around the world. Why shouldn’t you offer to split the bill in China, blow your nose in a handkerchief in Japan or make the ‘thumbs-up’ sign in Iran? The often surprising answers are all here. This website is the interactive bit. Feel free to join in with comments on these stories or up to date intercultural insights of your own...mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-36599816585952487032010-01-29T06:41:00.000-08:002010-01-29T09:43:23.441-08:00MAMA BOY<strong>Every now and then I get comments on <em>Going Dutch</em> from round the world (it's now been translated into 8 languages), either agreeing with me or putting me right. This one comes from an Italian called Marco, and I thought I'd share it. Coming from an Italian man, it may be the last word on Italian men:</strong><br /><br />I read your book while backpacking in Patagonia for a little more than 2 weeks. I spent most of my life travelling the world and so I found myself agreeing with you in almost everything, in particular when you talk about Japan and Japanese. I lived there for 4 years and for work I'm going back very often, almost too often sometimes.There is only a couple of things I quite disagree and I'd like to share them with you. I don't remember at what point of the book you mention something about Italians being just MAMA-BOY and to be helpless Playboy. First of all, even if was true that men stay with their family till their early thirties I don't really see what is wrong with that? Everybody is travelling the world to discover the different way people live their life but as soon as the italians don't show enough machisimo or we, I'm 100% italian too, we don't fit in the western's idea of when men have to live their family's homes...and so people call us MAMA-BOY. Plus if a man in a family is a MAMA-BOY trust me that the responsibility is more on the MAMA then the boy. I really don't know many of those MAMA-BOY in Italy but I swear I know lots of them in USA where it seems that the majority of the white-trash men are REALLY MAMA-BOY. Anyway, what I really want you to know that maybe Italians are playboy, maybe it's true that we flirt a lot...but you know what Mark? It works. It really does and women love it. In 10 days in Chile I slept with 4 girls. I didn't pay them, if that what you think and they are all attractive western woman. I'm proud of it? Not particularly, I'm sure that the same girls may have fallen for somebody else but they did for me because FIRST I tried, SECOND... I gave them attentions they won't get anywhere else. "Italians do it better" because we care more about a woman's pleasure than our own. That's the reason why women love Italian men.They love other men too but no one has our reputation and other men from other nationalities are always trying to make fun of us or actually embarrass us but they often do it because they know the difference. Mark trust me I'm not trying to convince no one that italian men are better, not at all, I wouldn't wish my sister to date an italian trust me, but is true that what we often do to seduce a woman is the what many women want.That's all, so maybe you can add a few lines in the new edition of your book. Or not!mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-33361208001794747232009-01-15T01:23:00.000-08:002009-01-15T01:43:42.342-08:00australians are the most offensive ...... in the workplace, a new <a href="http://www.reuters.com/article/newsOne/idUSTRE50E21M20090115">international survey </a>has found. Yet the most easily upset by offensive behaviour in the world - apparently - were English and Americans. Top 'offensive behaviours' were found to be: 1) not saying hello or good morning; 2) not offering guests a beverage; 3) speaking loudly across the room; 4) using swear words and 5) taking calls on mobile phones.<br /><br />Can we really believe that? I don't know about Americans but I would have thought most English offices were pretty laid back - certainly able to deal with the odd foul-mouthed Aussie or two. In any case, these days we hardly have a culture that worries unduly about such things, see such fine examples of workplace good manners as chef Gordon Ramsay and tycoon Sir Alan Sugar.<br /><br />The survey was by Servcorp, by the way - an Australian-based company!mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-27900816512324286582009-01-01T02:18:00.000-08:002009-01-01T02:40:39.671-08:00the etiquette of overcharging in IndiaLast summer, taxi drivers in Beijing were one of several groups given etiquette training ahead of the international influx of the Olympics. (Among other tips, they were advised not to eat garlic.) Now autorickshaw drivers in Delhi are being given similar lessons in preparation for the 2010 Commonwealth Games. As reported on ExpressIndia.com they are being encouraged to learn English, not smoke <em>bidis</em> (small hand-rolled cigarettes), and not overcharge foreigners. I particular like the frankness of driver Pankaj Singh, who says, 'While it's completely fair to behave well and not overcharge how much money do we make if we are fair? It's only with foreigners that we make some extra money by overcharging. At least we're not being unfair with our own people.' An attitude held by how many other taxi drivers the world over?<br /><br /> <a href="http://www.expressindia.com/latest-news/auto-drivers-get-etiquette-stress-management-tips/404066/">http://www.expressindia.com:80/latest-news/auto-drivers-get-etiquette-stress-management-tips/404066/</a>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-49309795486142127742008-12-29T02:12:00.000-08:002008-12-29T02:40:28.665-08:00George Bush and the size 10 shoes'This is the farewell kiss, you dog,' shouted TV reporter Muntadhar al-Zaidi as he hurled two shoes at Bush during a farewell press conference in Baghdad. Some reports suggested they missed their target, but as you can see in the attached clip, Bush proved adept in his dodging, as the first shoe at least was pretty much on target. Subsequently, al-Zaidi has become a hero in his own country, even as he was allegedly beaten by security guards. The Iraqi parliament was then thrown into turmoil in a debate on his continued detention. Round the world, meanwhile, people have been fascinated by the power of this deeply considered breach of etiquette. Here is a link to a clip from the Brazilian Sunday night magazine programme <a href="http://fantastico.globo.com/Jornalismo/FANT/0,,MUL931536-15605,00-NUNCA+DE+UMA+FIGA+DE+PRESENTE+PARA+UM+COREANO.html">'Fantastico'</a>, in which I make a short appearance ...mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-38224012261862689892008-11-19T05:12:00.000-08:002008-11-19T05:24:43.733-08:00going dutch in budapestI was at the ITIC conference in Budapest last week to give a talk on 'global etiquette' based on Going Dutch. The feedback afterwards from the variety of international delegates was extremely interesting. One told of a presentation at a conference in China not being as effective as it might have been because they used their normal blue balloons to decorate their stand. After a local pointed out that blue is the colour of mourning, the balloons were changed to red, the colour of good fortune.<br />Another delegate, an Australian doctor, told me that she'd been working in Jordan and found that as a woman some of the local doctors didn't want to return her proferred handshake. Puzzled and a bit offended by this, she mentioned this to some American colleagues in the evening, who were instantly up in arms: <em>'Which </em>doctor? We need to have a word with him?' Truly a double-whammy of intercultural confusion!mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-21681859135634866172008-07-11T12:05:00.000-07:002008-07-22T02:57:29.472-07:00bmi intercultural guidesI've been working with the airline bmi to produce a series of cultural guides to a range of new destinations they're flying to, from Almaty, Kazakhstan through Tbilisi, Georgia to Khartoum, Sudan. The idea being that business travellers can get up to speed on local customs and manners before they arrive. It's been interesting expanding my knowledge of global etiquette, and also fun being able to concentrate on individual places. Have a look at <a href="http://www.flybmi.com/businessguides">http://www.flybmi.com/businessguides</a> Who knows where this kind of initiative may lead?mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-26074676696310431252008-07-02T08:35:00.000-07:002008-07-31T04:35:53.876-07:00use your thumbEating with your hands is one of the subjects I cover in the book. What would be frowned on in Finland is de rigueur in India. I recently found this take on the subject ...<br /><br /><a href="http://www.indax.com/eating.html">http://www.indax.com/eating.html</a>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-5301293121266906652008-07-02T08:24:00.000-07:002008-07-31T04:36:26.977-07:00the international office kitchenHere's an intriguing piece, on the vexed subject of sharing an office kitchen. This comes from the US, but I wonder to what extent these frustrations apply in all cultures?<br /><br /><a href="http://www.ajc.com/business/content/business/stories/2008/07/01/office_kitchen_etiquette_0701.html">http://www.ajc.com/business/content/business/stories/2008/07/01/office_kitchen_etiquette_0701.html</a>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-58448724324568807122008-06-05T03:14:00.000-07:002008-06-05T04:50:17.054-07:00indian mannersI was on a panel last night talking about travel writing. Afterwards a woman who had spent a lot of time in Goa came up to add her thoughts on <em>Going Dutch</em>. In her experience, she said, people generally don't go in for saying 'please' or 'thank you' in India. 'Sorry' would hardly ever be heard. And if you give someone a present, the custom is not to thank the giver, but to put it immediately away.<br /> All this ties in interestingly with what I said in the book about 'please' and 'thank you' not being at so much of a premium in much of Africa as they are here in the UK (The Magic Words, p.50); also about presents not being opened in front of the giver in the Far East, particularly Japan, where there is always a danger of the receiver 'losing face' through disappointment (You Really Shouldn't Have, p.65).<br /> Does anyone out there have similar experiences with 'please', 'thank you' and 'sorry', not to mention differences in ways of receiving gifts around the world...mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-39776382415365143842007-12-04T12:05:00.000-08:002008-07-31T04:37:26.493-07:00les bisesIn the book (p. 11) I put the French down for two air-kisses to the cheek as their style of greeting, but now it seems from a new survey that this might not be the whole picture. In Paris and central France I'm right: but up in the north, from Normandy across to the Belgian border, <em>les bises</em> habitually consists of <em>four</em> pecks on the cheek; while in the south-east, apparently, they go for trois.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article2980475.ece">www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article2980475.ece</a>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-20268259972969252712007-11-12T11:02:00.000-08:002007-11-12T11:10:49.212-08:00la pause-cafeWell, here's something I haven't got in the book. The importance of 'la pause-cafe', or coffee break, in France. And our poor correspondent didn't realise for <em>two years</em> what she was doing wrong. When you're the outsider isn't it often like that? People just let you muddle on until you realise that it's not your shocking personal hygeine or terrible jokes that's to blame for the fact that nobody talks to you.<br /> I'm glad to see that she ties in with my advice about toasts and business cards, though.<br /> <a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2007/oct/27/work1">http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2007/oct/27/work1</a>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-51435596286845560242007-10-23T07:11:00.000-07:002007-10-23T07:25:25.781-07:00learning spanishA Spanish teacher was explaining to her class of foreign students that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine. ‘House’, for example, is feminine – ‘la casa’; ‘pencil’, however, is masculine: ‘el lapiz.’<br /><br />A student asked, ‘And what gender is “computer”?’ Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether ‘computer’ should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.<br /><br />The men's group decided that ‘computer’ should definitely be of the feminine gender (‘la computadora’) because:<br /><br />1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic<br />2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else<br />3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and<br />4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending halfyour pay cheque on accessories for it.<br /><br />The women's group meanwhile concluded that computers should be masculine (‘el computador’), because:<br /><br />1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on<br />2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves<br />3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and<br />4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have got a better model.<br /><br /><strong></strong><br /><em>This (slightly adapted) joke came from a great discussion forum called intercultural insights (link above). If you want to get into the full-on nitty gritty of up-to-the-minute intercultural thinking, this is the place. </em>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-12984749938984651242007-10-08T09:02:00.000-07:002008-08-01T02:12:23.476-07:00Going Dutch in Beijing homepage<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1861971702/markmccrumcom-21"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 193px; height: 289px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggCZJX3BeB60i1Cuo0FS0rtqTetMNZ4T0VAC7-zkwUII1V4V1tZoySaNigCs3lEUQh6UXU6fX8zm3RLaK1aqE9Ekci36DBqLCA_Vpw3o3uw-PfTCwckMrTS_2tpWeta_39jrG6_4ndw0E6/s320/goingdutchcover4.jpg" alt="Buy from Amazon.co.uk" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5229127258645147250" border="0" /></a>Welcome to the <span style="font-style: italic;">Going Dutch</span> website. The book is published by <a href="http://www.profilebooks.com">Profile</a> and should now be in all good bookshops as well, of course, as being available from <a href="http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1861971702/markmccrumcom-21">Amazon ...</a><br /><br />When researching the book, I added to my own experience of travelling on six continents by talking to other travellers, as well as those who grew up or have worked in the different places I've written about around the world. I also scoured the internet and asked endless questions in intercultural and other chatrooms. Hopefully my advice is all spot on and bang up to date, but the world is a huge and ever-changing place, so feel free to let me know that actually in that in Japan they no longer mind if you blow your nose into a handkerchief (p.111); in Argentina the <em>piropo</em> is now regarded as deeply sexist and offensive (p. 27); or in Vietnam they no longer drink coffee that has been brewed from beans vomited by weasels (p. 96).<br /><br />And do feel free to share any stories of your own of that moment when you realise you've just put your culturally insensitive foot in it big time ...<br /><br /><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikbJpWrgU2FgFXGb10W4JFK_HVJU0ElGziRrXQPX0Pp_Ke6knfUcsP4uDVS_NPTCEyy5GlmlICKYT063oqKCqnkusjYjMm4F0XRXdV98HyM_-ifFEdIW_JtfgDMMkA12R0WR-pY1ikzlzb/s1600/bush+holding+hands.jpg" alt="" border="0" /><br /><br /><br />Even the most powerful world leaders have to observe the local etiquette...mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-5011018742189757572007-10-07T12:16:00.000-07:002008-07-30T12:22:14.194-07:00About the Author<img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 161px; height: 120px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkH3IaSAdBmmqQePKQOHfNLttj8BmzDsVJP0k_TqgrQu9XtGEii3i7ovTmQbS-aU5PyCxpWaQbL4Us8PAP4uWpulAVXn-gFo7zdkiZIdZhpom73O6EVj4wInNFaYtBeBPOpSuJPs2Wfm3e/s660/Copy+of+mark+mccrum+1.JPG" alt="" border="0" />Mark McCrum has visited six of the seven continents (not Antarctica) and written travel books about Southern Africa, Australia and Ireland. He has been mugged in Rio, picknicked on a glacier in Chilean Patagonia and has lunched with the King of the Zulus (a strict teetotaller whose manners were impeccable). He lives in London, where people love to queue.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.markmccrum.com/">Visit Mark McCrum's website</a>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6301149581151303086.post-8790831097801460492007-10-07T12:11:00.000-07:002008-07-31T04:55:10.736-07:00Reviews of Going Dutch in Beijing'A delight to read, and full of funny, helpful and thought-provoking information. Airline staff should hand a copy out with each boarding pass they issue; that way we might all understand more about the places we travel to, and do a little less damage.'<br />John Simpson, BBC World Affairs Editor<br /><br />'A funny and fascinating reminder that the British way is definitely not the only way ... this is essentially the <em>Rough Guide to Not Getting Beaten Up Abroad</em>.'<br />Danny Wallace, author of <em>Yes Man</em><br /><em></em><br />'The ultimate no-tears travel guide'<br /><em>The Independent</em><br /><br />'An invaluable look at global etiquette'<br /><em>Wanderlust</em><br /><br />'Why deal with the declining dollar and the hassles of international air travel, when one can grab this book and zoom anywhere? Smartly organised and cleverly written, this little book is full of entertaining tidbits'<br /><em>Elizabeth Taylor, Chicago Tribune</em><br /><br />'What could be better than this clever little global guide to doing the right thing, from first greeting to last rites'<br /><em>Belfast Telegraph</em><br /><br />'Essential for any traveller'<br /><em>Good Book Guide</em><br /><br />'Universal in its subject matter and readership; well researched and humorously depicted'<br /><em>Geographical Magazine</em><br /><br />'Makes travelling a piece of cake'<br />Mark Ellingham, founder of <em>Rough Guides</em>mark mccrumhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10818978811906289481noreply@blogger.com